Layer 1.0 : Metablog English Class

Well this is it

English class in the EPIC University of Chile was a very interesting experience. I have never run a blog before so there is that as a new acquired wisdom (which I will forget right now anyways), but I don’t know…..I think it would be better if we can do class in any moment but NOT the afternoon.

I mean the blogs are funny and all that jazz but it’s too late and I am too tired to pretend am some internet celebrity of the 90s (seriously who use blogger in this day instead of social media?) So I could have a better opinion of the English if it wasn’t too late in the afternoon. I mean I need to be in my house so I can make dark rituals with Cthulu and play Despacito 2 in my computer with Windows XP

Also the exams are in January and I don’t have time for that shit because I want to start working full time in the cinema close of my home so I can make more MONEY that a filmmaking student .

My English I think is okay, I hope, but I don’t know my pronunciation can be better so I don’t sound like some Indian immigrant that is friend of Apu. I guess I can improve that if practice more talking but THIS IS FUCKING CHILE , the only English this faggots says is “sorry” and “Fortnite”. At least I listing a lot of English when I am watching Youtube videos and Bad porn.   

So fuck it

GOODBYE EPIC DAB

Layer 0.9 Juan Gomez Milla.exe

ICEI is a funny place and by funny I mean that I am contemplating to make Coup d'état just to destroy Vivaldi in an epic anime fight.MP4 with LINKIN PARK in the background.

FUCKING FAGGOT

So where do we star?

There are a lot of electives that are not electives because you need SIXTEEN fucking credits to pass this shit, so fucking bullshit with your fake news house of Bello, meaning that I am OBLIGED to make the electives instead of have time to do journalist shit like smoke crack and winning more money that a student of filmmaking. 

Better that a magic "Queque" or whatwhat

In terms of workload is very random like a box of chocolates, so I don’t know when bad things can’t happen but when it happens and overexploitation begins it is…………………………………….

Bad.

Also fucking buildings. Did the rectors of this hellhole have some sexual fetishism for brutalism? Like they saw Chernobyl and think “yeah I want that shit in my fucking campus” and then start snorting cocaine like Wall Strett investor.

Vivaldi special. With love UWU

 And that only if this shit is fucking finished, it looks like the set of Mad Max that a third world campus, or better it looks like a third world campus so fucked.

WOW the "Aulario" 3 is looking better this days

Now there is a lot of computers because we have to pretend that we are in the 21 century, but sometimes there is not internet and pretty sure the TV studio will have  a penalty fee from the Sub secretary of Work because there is only time before somebody died for an electric burn or crushed by the spotlights.

IM GOING TO KILL YOU COCKSUCKER

But at least the teachers teach well. Sort of.

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And for Vivaldi

Fucking Fa-

Layer 0.8 : I dont (like) summer

I don’t like summer, is very hot and I don’t like that shit. This is why I always prefer going to the south every summer so I kind of GTFO of the social obligations of adult life. But that just wishful thinking, the south is a place I would like to visit but generally i ended trapped in Santiago whith all the smog, “puros kumas” and THE FUCKING SUN.

FUUUUUUCK

At least I know I am going to have more time to visit my friends from school, more time to watch chinese cartoons and more time to consume alcohol in industrial levels, o boy that hangover is going to be very bad, like I expect my liver to commit harakiri in the end of February or something like that.

End of February 2019

I expect also to visit my family that lives in Colina, close to the famous jail “Colina 2” where the sun is hotter, there is a lot of dust and horses run in the streets and they shit also in the streets, so is normal that the smell doesn’t is very N I C E.

Fucking Asshole

-¿Are going to study in summer?

R: Are you on meth madafacka? Who study in summer? Do I look like a fucking nerd to you?

I expect to work in the cinema of Mall Plaza Norte so I can have enough money to buy……Things.

DON´T ASK

Anyways that’s not the point, the point is that the summer is bad, the sun is bad I don’t want more of this shit. Cthulhu please awaken and kill us all.

YAY

Layer 0.7: Booking a lot

Now I am going to talk about my favorite thing about books, that is that they are good kill mosquitoes…..I’m joking, kind of.

My favorite author is Michael Crichton, father of the techno-thriller. Many of his work are science fiction like The Andromeda Strain but also he has written a lot of crime novels like The Great Train Robbery or political ones like Rising Sun. Many of the theme of his book is the distrust of modern politics, corporations and science advancement without ethics, been represented in his most famous work: Jurassic Park that was later adapted by Steven Spielberg in a movie in 1993. Generally I like book about science fiction or thrillers, fantasy is not discarded and also I like some surrealist and philosophical jobs like the tales written by Jorge Luis Borges in especial Tlön, Uqbar, Orbis Tertius , The Lottery in Babylon and The Library of Babel are some of my favorite ones.

My favorite book is between Jurassic Park itself (the longest version which has a lot of violence and blood) and the House of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewsky which is a surreal book and very very crasy , you need to read it to understand what I meant with that one.

Finally the last book I read was… i don’t know, something of Baradit so in any case I doesn’t matter to much and it was a waste of money .

Bye

Layer 0.6: Keep Moving Forward? No Thanks Bro (Warning nothing makes sense here)

Why I will want to do a postgrad? I mean what the fuck dude? My only plan was to finish the journalism career, lay down and work until I’m dead. It was going to work very fine. Even the dead it was going to be great with a Kalashnikov, Serbian bitches and a Purple Tiger named Gracilda-Chan.

Future Projections : With a lot of bobbies

But whatever the only consideration that I could make will be studying a hyper mega deluxe specialization in some kind of investigative journalism of some kind (Maybe journalism in Alvaro Salas now that is my dad and of all of Chile I guess) Maybe I will going to study to a country (Uzbekistan?) that have very tax lax so I can be a Youtuber (That plays FORTNITE 2) apart of the postgrad.

Living the life Baby

Or maybe I can study some other career like cock fights or the sweet enterprise of opium traffic, the CIA have some sweet offer in Afghanistan in crime wars and black operations.

Anyways that study has to be part time because I am busy man and I have shit to write.

Now thats what i call postgraduate studies.

Maybe I will wait when I have money (A lot of money) and a Yacht (That I will  call “We Live in Society IV”) before doing any of that.

First this and then i will do the postgrad

To be sincere i dont really know what i want to do after the career so i have being doing  a lot of shitposting to deal with this existential dread in this post. So in the case plans are not in consideration yet so for the moment the only thing I want right now is a refreshing Sprite Drink. 

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And glass JGM with the help of Nyarlathothep but that can wait.

FUCKING MAYOL NOBODY LIKES THE FRENTE AMPLIO FUCKING HIPPIE.

Layer 0.5 : Job and slavery

Well…. I don’t want to be a shop clerk that’s one thing for sure. I reality what I want to do is being a TV or internet journalist that work creating audiovisual content to the masses. I will like a lot if this job led me travel a lot, going to a war zone (and died) or some strange place (like Uzbekistan UWU) learning more about this weird planet. I expected to be an outdoor and indoor job, working only in a office I will ve very boring and for that I have my free time wasting my live. I expecting gain half a million? I don’t know It depends of how kind are my future employees, maybe I can surpass the million itself…that will be cool, or I will die homeless that also will be…not so cool. I don’t expect to take any mayor, maybe a specialization on investigative journalism so I can have a way better salary that what I expect to have (in practice you ear 100.000 CLP so go figure). The channels that I expect work on are Mega or CNN but if in near future some new awesome media network is created in the internet I will not refrain for that option.

Anyway wait I wanted to say is that I don’t want to die poor.

Layer 0.4: Food and Clorox

Sup dudes now I’m going to talk about the thing that everybody likes (or they will DEAD)

FOOD.

In my case the thing that I like to eat a part of the souls of virgins is pizza. I like a lot eating pizza especially pizza with a lot of meat, pork or chicken. Eating animals is the best SUCK A CARROT VEGANS (EPIC DAB)

My favorite restaurant is Papa John´s because the pizza there is very good and very spicy. This in contrast of what I eat normally; sadly in the cafeteria of the University of Chile pizza is not an option. Generally in there they rotate the food at random with meat and vegetables (the vegans are it again). Sadly cooking’s is not an ability I have to make pizza (Only sandwiches that don’t suck) so I am enslaved to eat what the University has to offer to me which like I said is very random to know what they going to give you.

Anyways I tried to eat in Papa John’s anytime I have the opportune to do it. (Also write a blogspot here in my house is not funny)

Layer 0.3: Of Wolves and Machine Guns

So Japan exits the Second World War with two nukes in his ass , a German occupation (with kuchen) and guerrillas in the streets , how do you solve this problem?

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A U T H O R I T A R I A N   D E A T H   S Q U A D S

This is Jin-Roh

Fornite was never better

A depressed member of the Kerberos Corps (Fuze) finds love in a woman who claims be the sister of a commie (Because she wears red XDXDXD) girl that he saw make KABOOM in front of himself during a bad operation in the sewers of Japan. 

MFW

Will this member of a Death Squad maintain a stable relationship with someone for once in his life or he will always be a wolf chasing a red riding hood?

(There is lot of symbolism with red riding hood, you are warned)

Its not a exaggeration

This movie have fantastic animations, political thriller, gun porn (that machine guns *Italian kiss*), a cool armor, awesome artwork, a lot of violence , mystery, cynicism and tragedy romance. 

And a Great Soundtrack.

I like movies like this, action thrillers (not so fast not so slow) particularly with a bit of science fiction, also with a lot of gray morality so I can be an edgelord.

Santiago 2018

The last movie I saw was Pretty Woman (LONG LIVE JULIA ROBERTS) and it was for Ossa class so take that like you will.

GOODDAMN OSSA AHHHHHHHHHH....

Layer 0.2: Mickey is not real moron

Okey my niggas let round up to tell you the tale of why Walt Disney World is a very funny place where the hot of swamp of Orlando is replaced by fat gringos complaining about Donald Turmp in a magic show with robot pirates.

That shit was wild dude 

My family (one mom, two brothers) decided to GTFO of Chile during national holidays because and I quote: “cueca are for pussies” and instead going one week to the happiest place of Earth: My guns deale…Disneyland, er Walt Disney World of Orlando. 4 amusement parks (Mostly because Epcot is like the MIN but with doping) to have fun.

The game is that you are the Golf Ball , and then you die of an aneurysm

We rode a lot of rollercoasters, we ate food that is bad for my health (thanks Coca-Cola) and we saw real animal and fake animals that destroy the purpose of the first one. It was fun, and also I was capable to talk with the natives about gringo things, like oil and donuts. That explains the obesity.

Mcdonald was better in Chile 

And then we were to Universal Studios and discover that Mickey Mouse was nothing compared to the Incredible Hulk Rollercoaster, that shit was violent. I like violence.

NEVER FORGET

The lesson here is that going to a park in the U.S can be very funny. And also it was a very unique experience that have vacations in Algarrobo (corny)

And that’s it.

TAKE THE BLOOD OF YOUR ENEMY AND DRINK IT IN A CUP OF DEAD BABIES . LONG LIVE THE ETERNAL GOOD OF VHS MOVIES AND OWNER OF STAR WARS.

The End

Layer 0.1 : Uzbekistan Start wit UZUZ UwU

Aladdin would be fucking proud

So where to go as a journalist?

Oh boy that is an interesting question isn’t? But what better country that Uzbekistan? Or Grand Bukhara during the “good times” (Long live the Tsar). Located in Central Asia an forming part of the family of countries that ends in “-an” like Afghanistan of Turkmenistan, it was formed after the fall of the URSS (Thanks Gorbachov ) 

You are welcome motherfu....

A nice and warm country where corrupted state enterprise have control of the means of production , living up to the legacy of the Silk Road that cross that country in the times when Marco Polo was playing Zelda in the whole continent , having a nice quantity of farm lands and lot of fucking Uranium being sold to Uncle Sam YAY . This country also have the biggest army of Central Asia so that will explain his friendship with “Murica” if you consider that eagle country have given Uzbekistan a ton of cash to finance his soldier toys.  

"Should be you know , killing muslims  in Afghanistan?"

"We are not gringos SukalimSukalomgo"

"Hey thats racist Ukeltotico Michael Jackson"

"Globalization is a hell of a bitch eh"

They have some denounces of torture being put by the UN but as Chilean that will come like no shock to me, either way it will a nice place to denounce as a journalist and maybe being kill in some Black site and have my name put in the Auditorium of ICEI (suck it Jose Carrasco) .

                                                                  SOON

So yeah, Uzbekistan, did you know that country even exist?

Jesus modern art is out of control, eh fellas?